These three skills must be mastered for reasons beyond getting laid. Much of what TRP was founded seems focused on getting women, but the focus of this community seems to be evolving beyond that to becoming a complete man—attracting women becomes a by-product of this personal growth as opposed to the end-goal. All three of these skills are crucial to becoming a master of reality and excelling with one’s career, family, and relationships.
I’ll be digging into some of the concepts I’ve been developing and the methods I’m using to improve these three skills. Please contribute whatever you all can in the comments and I’ll bring them into this post if it’s novel and valuable
Pre-requisites & Mindset
- Self-awareness: Nothing improves without self-awareness. If you feel like your self-awareness is poor, start keeping a journal. This skill cannot be overlooked, period.
- Emotional detachment: Ever catch yourself laughing at your joke mid-delivery or grinning before you deliver a line? It’s a problem I used to have and still struggle with, and I call it a problem because it destroys the impact of whatever one is saying or doing. Learn to control your emotion so you release it at your discretion for maximum effect.
- Always-On: This isn’t an after work hobby that you practice for shits and giggles. It is cultivating a skillset that influences every aspect of your life, and needs to be exercised as such. Stuck in a meeting? Use that moment to read people’s intention, develop context-appropriate humor, and improve your messaging skills. On a date? Same as the meeting. Always be on.
- Positivity: All humor is rooted in negativity (just try and think of a joke that doesn’t prey on someone’s ignorance, a social problem, etc), but people respond well to good humor because it makes them feel good. One should strive be the source of happiness and positivity because it is something that so many lack and many seek. Make sure any reason you give has a positive subtext, and that your wit is not at someone’s expense. Be a force of positivity.
- Journaling: Keep a record of witty lines and jokes in a OneNote on your phone for future reference. Learn from these examples and draw from them when appropriate
- Reading: Wit comes from connecting together disparate concepts in the moment, but one needs to have broad knowledge to make that possible
- Socializing: Developing wit is like working out and it needs to be exercised daily. Take time to walk with a co-worker for a break, always eat meals with others if possible, and engage others as much as possible in different contexts (e.g. you don’t always have to hit on a woman when you talk to one)
- Role Models: Find people you want to emulate, and understand why you want to emulate these people. Two of mine are Robert Downey Jr and George Carlin. I aspire to radiate RDJ’s zero-fucks-given, life is a joke purely for my amusement mentality because I believe it is a powerful mindset for all aspect of life, and George Carlin’s social perceptivity—he was able to peer into the absurdity of society in a refreshing, hilarious, and insightful way. George Carlin would never be unknowingly controlled by a social situation / context because he would always be aware of it, and that is essential to staying on top since the world and one’s context is always changing.
Wit cannot be faked just like big muscles and a healthy body, and it is something that awes people because it is difficult to acquire. Women become weak around a witty man with solid communication skills and a mastery of subtext, and developing strong reasoning and subtext helps one parry the blows that others throw one’s way at every moment.
Reasoning: Good vs Bad Subtext
I’m still revising this section but this is a first pass at it.
Context: A plate is trying to force commitment and you don’t want that but you also want to continue spinning
- Her: I want us to get serious
- (Bad) Him: I don’t want a serious relationship because I want other people too
- (Better) Him: I am not ready for a serious relationship yet
- (Best) Him: I cannot get into a serious relationship because of personal goals and promises I’ve made to myself—even though I think we’re great for each other and you can see that I treasure you, I won’t let myself fail.
Reasoning: The bad example is direct, selfish, generates negative feelings, leaves no mystery and isn’t likely going to work as a result. The better example is decent because it leaves ambiguity with a mostly neutral position; there is, however, an opportunity for continued questioning which means frame control is going to be a pain in the ass. The best example, however, generates positive feelings in her, is driven by strong principles and frame as opposed to shallow reasons, is ambiguous, and allows one to retain ambiguity should any further questioning come—“I cannot elaborate on my reasons because it is psychologically proven that talking about goals before accomplishing them makes people less likely to succeed”, end of discussion.
Context: You’ve been working on a project and your boss forgot that he asked you to do it, forgot the specifics of the ask, or anything else that leads to misunderstanding and concern
- Your boss: I don’t think this is headed in the right direction, and I don’t understand why you’re working on it
- (Bad) You: You told me to do this—why are you suddenly changing your mind? Did you forget what you said?
- (Better) You: I understand your concern; I thought we were headed in the right direction. What do you want me to work on instead?
- (Best) You: Previous discussions led us to believe that this was worth our time, and I am sure we can find some use for this work. What do you recommend we do to salvage this?
Reasoning: The bad example stirs up negative emotion, places blame on your boss, and will put your career advancement at risk because he will not trust you with important / risky work which is a great way for career advancement. The better example takes personal blame even though your boss is likely responsible and is submissive to feed his ego, but it does not try to make some use of work done. The best example is ambiguous so blame is not clearly placed on anyone, is submissive to feed your boss’ ego, and tries to leverage work already done.
I’ll keep adding to this through the day.